Saturday, August 30, 2014

A memory

I have so much to update about, summer fun and first days of school but tonight I have something I want to remember.

I have spent endless hours preparing my classroom, meeting new faces, teaching all day, planning all night and today, I spent ALL day with my babies.  It was great!  They woke up WAY too early for a Saturday but we made the best of it by snuggling on the couch with books and a movie (and coffee!).  We played magnatiles and laughed as Easton Godzillaed my creations.  We watched daddy get soaked in a dunk tank and the boys rode rides together at a carnival.  We went to Topeka to hang with B, play toys, watch movies, eat pizza, and played outside.

As I drove my pajamaed dudes home I listened as Easton searched for his moon and when he finally found it, he requested that I get it for him.  Logan argued that he couldn't get the moon until he passed away and went to Heaven.  Easton was not buying it and continued his requests.  I told him he should try closing his eyes and maybe he would catch it in his dreams.

Thirty minutes outside of home they finally dozed off.  I pulled into our driveway, carefully removed the keys and tried to be as quiet as possible to open my door.  I decided to get the big man out first, he was HUGE and very heavy!  I tried to think back to the last time I actually carried him in my arms and was reminded of all of the times when he was little and we would dance around the kitchen to "Big Green Tractor."  I slowly carried that 60 lb. boy into his room in our quiet, dark house and held him a bit longer, unsure of the next time I would carry him and if at that time I would be able to.  I sat on the edge of his bed with him in my arms well aware that I was being like the creepy mommy in I'll Love You Forever but I just couldn't help it.  In my arms I held my son who started off so frail, who I wanted more than anything, who was 3 years old the last time I can remember him sleeping on me, and I just couldn't put him down.  I held him a couple minutes longer and thanked God for this amazing blessing that motherhood is.  I whispered to him that I loved him and he whispered it back.  In just 11 short days he will be six, how did this happen.

I slipped out of his room and back to the garage to get sleepy dude number two.  I stared at that little toe head with his pouty lips and remembered the first moment I saw him and how his lips looked just the same.  I scooped him up, a much easier feat than with #1, and gave him a snuggle and kiss.  I cherished his little body in my arms and the ease of lifting him in his crib because I was reminded that all too soon he will be a big boy just like his brother.

These dudes try my patience every chance they get but they fill my heart with a joy that I never knew until they entered my world.  Tonight I was talking with another couple about our struggles to have children and how difficult their births were.  I can feel the longing to be a mother like it was yesterday.  I am incredibly blessed to have these babies in my life and I know that they were chosen just for us.  I just wanted to put this down so I can remember it always.